May 14, 2016 • 17M

LA 026: The Two Enemies to Your Success-and How to Defeat Them

 
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Dr John Kenworthy
Hi, I am Dr John Kenworthy, a behavioural neuroscientist and expert Leadership AdvantEdge Coach. And I am thrilled that you've joined me here . My purpose is to Encourage, Develop, Guide and Empower you in the Art and Neuroscience of Expert Leadership so that you build a successful organisation and create a collaborative, high performing team with engaged, joyful employees. We call this: AdvantEdge Joy@Work
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FEAR is the number one reason that people never achieve their breakthrough to success. Yes, we can blame other people for not giving us the chance. We can lament that we took the wrong course. We can express concern about the uncertainty of obtaining that success, and maybe, just maybe I'll look stupid. In short, our fear comes down to two enemies. Our uncertain future and our excuses from the past. Or. More simply: "what if" and "If only".   What if/If only When you have a goal worth achieving, you will need to achieve breakthroughs. Breakthroughs that take you outside of your comfort zone and going outside your comfort zone is fearful.   So what can you do to ensure that you create the necessary breakthroughs that will lead to your dramatic transformation? And we have to conquer two enemies: “What if” and “If Only” And each requires you to do two things: Take courage Get off your ‘but’   Take courage Let me share a brief personal story: Known as the Swiss Wall, La Chavanette at Avoriaz is one of the most dangerous ski slopes in the world. It is a disturbingly steep, mogul run and the slope gets icy quickly, turning the area between moguls into ice sheets. Not making a turn in these situations means that you miss the next mogul, and pick up too much speed to make the next one after that, starting off a tumble that ends a couple of hundred metres down the slope, while hitting a few dozen icy bumps in the course.   A number of years ago, as a reasonable, but by no means good skier, I decided that I just had to conquer this slope. Why? Well, I can only now think that it was a moment of sheer madness. At the time, however, I just wanted to prove to myself that I could do it.   Standing at the top of the slope, I looked down the 40 degree slope with considerable fear mixed with trepidation, mixed with determination and a whole lot of cortisol and adrenaline pumping through my body. I took about 5 minutes to muster up the courage. To launch myself off the edge.   It was exhausting, knee jangling, hard concentrated deliberate movements. Desperately remembering to keep my weight down the hill and my edges as loose as I dared. Turn after turn after turn after turn. Around one mogul, push off, turn, shift weight, edge, again and again and again. Endorphins took over from the adrenaline to mask the pain in my legs and screaming lungs.   Finally, after what seemed an eternity, I arrived at the bottom of the slope. My legs like jelly, my heart racing tears from the icy wind streaming down my face. Every fibre of my body was pulsing with electricity and sheer, unbounded joy as dopamine filled my entire being. I was alive, I had done it. I hadn’t fallen. I had conquered the wall.   I hadn’t been fast. It hadn’t been elegant. But it had been me.     FEAR is the #1 issue when it comes to making a personal breakthrough.   FEAR is what you FEEL when your Amygdala (the emotional centre of your brain) considers that there is a threat to you and signals the production of Cortisol. Cortisol floods your blood stream and informs your heart to beat faster, your lungs to pump faster, your legs and arms to prepare to run or to fight and since all this demands energy, your digestive system is shut down. What you FEEL is warmer, you’ll perspire more due to the energy in your muscles and faster heart beat. You have “butterflies” in your stomach as the digestive tract is closed for business (heck who needs to digest food if you are about to be eaten…   Only, you are not about to be eaten. It’s highly likely that you are not about to die, nor about to get injured. The amygdala response is a primitive and essential trigger for survival. But it is very poor at distinguishing between a real threat to life and limb, and one that might possibly hurt your pride. It’s the same cortisol induced response. Your amygdala is essentially like a sentry guard checking the external environment and your own thinking process for the slightest sign of a threat to you. It is a